a constellation of us
by Forever in Your Heart
Summary: and if he could, he'd give every star her name
"Would you like to see the stars?" Jamie asks Victoria and she furrows her brow.

"What do you mean? The TARDIS doesn't have any windows."

Jamie grins and looks back at the Doctor, who nods and fiddles with some controls.

"Well, you see Victoria," the Doctor says, having finished with his fiddling. "Who needs windows when you have doors?"

He flings open the TARDIS doors then and Victoria gasps in horror, latching onto Jamie's arm. But nothing awful happens, nothing at all and Victoria loosens her grip, face a mask of confusion.

"What on earth...?" she mumbles, takes a hesitant step closer to the open doors.

Space stretches out before them, stars and galaxies and a bright, burning sun.

She exhales in surprise and the Doctor smiles encouragingly, beckons her closer. Victoria hasn't let go of his arm so Jamie goes with her to the doors, her eyes widening with ever step.

"It's...it's..." she can't seem to find the words, her face awash with wonder. She is entranced, can't pull her eyes away and Jamie is just as entranced, just not with the stars.

Though, with the way her eyes shine and her cheeks glow, she might very well be a star herself.

* * *

They've gotten lost, somehow, and Victoria holds his hand tight, looks around nervously.

"The Doctor said to head north, but how on earth are we meant to know which way is north?" she asks and Jamie shrugs, tries to think of some way out of this mess.

It's late and they're alone, no TARDIS in sight. They've got to figure something out, find something to point them in the right direction. His eyes slide upwards to the sky and memories start to trickle back to him, words his father spoke.

 _Ye see that star there? That's the north star, if ye're ever lost, just follow that and it'll lead ye home_

Jamie starts to smile, squeezes Victoria's hand.

"It's alright. Ye see that bright star, there?"

She nods and Jamie smiles a bit more.

"That's the north star."

Victoria's eyes widen as realization comes to her and then she beams, hugs his arm.

"Oh Jamie, you're brilliant!

He grows a bit warm, grin large.

"That is reassuring though, that the stars will always point you home," she says and Jamie nods, begins to pull her along.

 _Home_ , he thinks, _home is you and the Doctor._

* * *

"It's _beautiful_ ," Victoria sighs, looks up at the sky of Auroria, where the stars are always visible, even in daylight.

They sparkle around the sun and Victoria is mesmerized, cannot look away.

"Isn't it beautiful, Jamie?" she asks and he nods, never takes his eyes off her happy face.

"Aye, it is."

* * *

After their recent trips to two rather cold locales, the Doctor gets the bright idea of heading somewhere warm. Of course, the warm place he chooses just so happens to be in the midst of a civil war and he, Jamie and Victoria wind up running for their lives through the jungle, desperate to avoid execution for being spies.

They find cover in a small cave, far off from the TARDIS and decide to spend the night rather than trek out where angry locals may be lurking.

They sit in the mouth of the cave and the Doctor points out the local constellations, tracing them with his finger and Jamie can't see a single one. He narrows his eyes, furrows his brow and tries his best to make out the shapes the Doctor claims are there.

"And see, there, is _Vularchzhik_ , the dancing bear."

Jamie can't see a thing and Victoria frowns, can't seem to see it either.

"Ye ken," Jamie whispers, leaning in close to her, "I think he's just making it up now."

"Oh, hush Jamie," she replies, swatting at his arm but her lips turn up in the start of a smile.

"Ah yes, and that over there, is _Crizetchken_ the singing chicken," the Doctor proclaims. Jamie catches Victoria's eye and raises his eyebrow and she covers her face to muffle her giggles.

"Yes, it is a bit silly, isn't it?" the Doctor asks and Victoria leans into Jamie, laughing harder. He grins and the Doctor starts pointing out a few more, and alright, maybe they had to run for their lives today, but this, the three of them right here?

This is worth it.

* * *

"A shooting star!" the Doctor calls out excitedly and Jamie looks up, sees it shoot across the sky.

"Make a wish, Jamie!" Victoria says, smile brighter than the moon.

 _I wish...that every day could feel like this one_

* * *

The boat they're on bucks in the rough waves and Victoria clutches tight to Jamie's arm.

She's terrified, pressed close to his side and he tries desperately to come up with something to reassure her, to put her at ease. His eyes catch on the night sky above them, stars shining steadily on.

"Victoria," he murmurs in her ear, "just look up at the stars. No matter how rough the waves may get, the stars never change. Just keep your eyes on them."

The water churns beneath them but Jamie and Victoria make an anchor of the stars and hold each other firm.

With her hand in his, Jamie thinks he could do anything.

Anything at all.

* * *

They're on Lebellan and its legendary rainbow moon shines down on them, bathes everything in dazzling colours.

The Doctor's wandered off and Jamie and Victoria sit side by side on a hillside, gaze up at the sky together.

"I love moments like these," Victoria murmurs, voice as soft as an angel's wing. "No danger, no peril, just...us, seeing the beauty of the universe. If every day were like this, I think I'd stay forever."

It's barely a whisper but Jamie hears it, feels something tight curl in his stomach. He doesn't know what to say, doesn't like the tone of her words.

He knows he'll stay for as long as he can, with the Doctor and Victoria and all of time and space stretched out before them.

"Aye," is all he manages and he puts an arm around Victoria's shoulders, pulls her closer just to reassure himself that she's here and not going anywhere. She rests her head on his shoulder and she's beautiful, skin shining in starlight and painted every colour of the rainbow.

He can feel words crawling up his throat but he saves them for later, leans his cheek against her hair.

After all, there's no rush.

They have all the time in the world.

* * *

Jamie stands outside, a heavy weight on his shoulders.

 _Victoria's staying behind_

He breathes in deep and looks up at the sky. The stars are particularly bright tonight and he wishes on each and every one.

 _Please, let me convince Victoria to come with us._

 _Please._

* * *

Jamie McCrimmon has seen the stars in ways no one else could ever dream.

But when he kisses Victoria Waterfield, he does _so much more_ than see them.

He can _taste_ them on her lips, _feel_ them in his blood.

And in that moment, _she_ is the stars and he the night sky, made brighter by her light and trying hard to keep her near.

But just as the sky can't stop the stars from falling, Jamie McCrimmon can't stop Victoria Waterfield from leaving.

* * *

Victoria's gone but the stars keep shining and there's a part of Jamie that can't, _won't_ understand why.

Jamie loves travelling, loves the Doctor, loves it all but there's a piece missing, a part of his heart left behind.

The Doctor is made of patient smiles and "you know, I was fond of her too" but Jamie doesn't need sympathy, he needs Victoria.

But she stayed behind, chose life without him.

"It's for the best," the Doctor says and maybe it is, but right now, Jamie can't quite believe it.

He's not sure he ever will.

(and still the stars keep shining, like nothing's wrong, nothing's changed, like everything's the same as it's always been)

* * *

Life goes on and so does Jamie.

He can't pretend he's unhappy, but he can't say he doesn't miss her either.

He imagines, sometimes, telling her of all their adventures, imagines what she might say. He tries to conjure up her face, the expression she'd make and it makes the ache of missing her harden and soften all at the same time.

But still, he's happy, is having the time of his life.

He only hopes she is too.

And maybe, one day, he'll get the chance to tell her about all the things she's missed.

* * *

A shooting star flashes across the sky and Jamie traces its path with his eyes.

 _Make a wish Jamie_

He can hear her voice and he closes his eyes, wishes with all his heart.

 _Let us meet again_

 _please_

* * *

Jamie sits at the edge of the TARDIS, legs dangling off into outer space. He can hear Zoe and the Doctor behind him, talking about things he couldn't even pretend to understand and he still finds it so breathtakingly unbelievable that he can do this, sit here with the doors open and nothing around and beneath him but an endless sea of stars.

He looks at those stars, can't even begin to count them and wonders if Victoria is doing the same, back home on Earth. He wonders if they're looking at the same stars right now and he can almost feel her, sitting beside him.

"Alright, inside now Jamie!" the Doctor calls and Jamie stands.

"Where do you think we'll end up?" Zoe asks and Jamie casts one last look at the stars.

"Oh, wherever adventure takes us, I should think," the Doctor answers and Jamie closes the doors with a smile.

Maybe, when they're finished with their next adventure, he'll ask the Doctor to take him to see Victoria.

Because whoever said goodbye had to be forever?


End file.
